Forgive Yourself – This is me, breathing deep, breathing free, and allowing myself to let happiness find its way back into my life. It feels like a quiet revolution—a moment when I finally permit myself to let go of all the guilt and self-blame that’s been weighing me down.
If there’s one thing I’ve learned this year, it’s this: forgiving others is hard, but forgiving yourself? That’s another level of difficulty.
I’ve had plenty of moments where I needed to extend grace to others, some of them much harder than I’d like to admit (and trust me, those stories will get their blog post). But the hardest pardons I’ve had to grant are the ones I’ve had to say out loud, staring into the mirror. The ones I’ve needed to offer myself.
And yet, those difficult “I forgive you”s? They’re life-changing. They’re transformative. They’re necessary.
Inspired by the powerful words of Heide Priebe and her essay on forgiveness, I decided it was time to create my list—things I think we all need to forgive ourselves for. Because self-forgiveness is a journey, one that we often overlook but is deeply essential for our growth and happiness.
1. Forgive Yourself for Longing for What You No Longer Have
It’s human nature to want what you don’t have and to blame yourself when you lose something or someone important. But here’s the truth: What will be, will be. Holding onto the past only keeps you stuck in a place you no longer belong. The only way to find peace with a loss is by forgiving yourself for losing it in the first place. It’s okay to grieve, but eventually, you must move forward.
2. Forgive Yourself for Taking Your Time to Get Where You Need to Be
We each have our own path. Some roads are smooth and clear, while others are winding and full of obstacles. There’s no right way to navigate life, and there’s no timeline that says you should be at a certain point by a certain age. Relax. Whether it’s through life, love, heartbreak, or career, trust that you are exactly where you need to be. Your journey will help you grow, and your destination will be beautiful.
3. Forgive Yourself for Not Being Able to Forgive So Quickly
Our hearts can only take so much before they need time to heal. It’s okay if forgiveness doesn’t come instantly. Sometimes the scars run deep, and the wounds need time to close. Forgiving others and ourselves is a process—one that can’t be rushed. So if it’s taking longer than expected to forgive, be kind to yourself. You’ll get there, in your own time.
4. Forgive Yourself for Telling Yourself You’re Not Enough
We all have moments of insecurity, those times when we convince ourselves we’re not smart enough, pretty enough, or successful enough. It’s a lie we’ve been told by others or by society, and it’s a lie we’ve learned to repeat to ourselves. But here’s the truth: You are enough. You’ve always been enough. And those moments of doubt? They’re just part of being human. Forgive yourself for buying into the lie. Then, let it go.
5. Forgive Yourself for Needing Breaks
Maybe it was a bad day, a tough week, or even a year that felt like it would never end. During those times, it’s easy to feel like you’re failing because you had to hit pause. But guess what? We all need breaks sometimes. We need space to breathe, to be, to reset. There is strength in knowing when to step back. In the end, you’ll be stronger for the grace you’ve given yourself.
6. Forgive Yourself for Not Anticipating Life’s Curveballs
Life is unpredictable, and sometimes it throws us curveballs we never saw coming. That friend you thought was loyal? Turns out they weren’t. The relationship you were sure would last forever? It didn’t. You couldn’t have known—no one could. Stop blaming yourself for not seeing the signs or predicting the outcome. We can’t live our lives in fear of what might go wrong. Sometimes, it’s those unexpected twists that lead us to exactly where we need to be.
7. Forgive Yourself for All the Ways You’ve Changed
Change is inevitable. Physically, mentally, emotionally—we evolve. Life forces us to adapt, to grow, to shed parts of ourselves that no longer serve us. It’s okay to change. In fact, it’s necessary. Forgive yourself for any guilt or hesitation you’ve felt about who you’re becoming. Embrace the person you are now, and the person you’re still growing into.
8. Forgive Yourself for Letting Others Impact Your Self-Worth
We’ve all let someone else’s opinion shape how we see ourselves, whether it was a critical comment from a stranger or a hurtful remark from someone close to us. But the truth is, other people’s thoughts and actions have no bearing on your worth. You are valuable because of who you are, not because of what others think. Don’t let their judgments define you.
9. Forgive Yourself for All the Weak Moments
We are more than our weaknesses, more than our bad decisions, and more than our shortcomings. Without those moments, we wouldn’t be here today as the people we are now. Every failure, every misstep, every mistake—it’s all part of the process. Be thankful for how far you’ve come, for every stumble that led you to this moment. You are a work in progress, and that’s something to be proud of.
10. Forgive Yourself for What Comes Next
Life is full of unknowns, and that can be scary. But trust that everything will work out the way it’s meant to. Especially if you continue to be kind and gentle with yourself. No matter what happens next, forgive yourself in advance for the inevitable mistakes and wrong turns. Because through it all, you’ll keep growing, and that’s what really matters.
Forgiveness has its own timeline, but no matter where you are in your life, I hope some of these reflections resonate with you. The journey to self-forgiveness isn’t easy, but it’s one of the most important things you can do for yourself. It’s not about erasing the past—it’s about releasing the guilt and embracing your humanity.
So, what do you need to forgive yourself for? Let’s talk about it. Share your thoughts in the comments below. Remember, it’s a process, but you’re worth it. You always have been.
